Sa wat dit from Thailand. How you have survived this long without a dollop of fresh blog to pour over I just don't know but we're glad that you have made it back so i can waste some more of your time.

Previously on The Long Way To Milford Sound.......
Rory and Ryan arrived in Singapore where Ryan through up and lost his wallet. Rory relaxed in the warm waters and golden sands of Pulau Tioman in southern Malaysia. After joining forces with two other intrepid travellers they bused it all the way to the Twin Towers and grimey streets of Kuala Lumpar. From here they made their way to Melaka where Rory flexed his Backgammon muscles and showed Malaysia what us Irish Backgammoners are made of. A twisty road to the Cameron Highlands lay ahead of them, where cool clean air was a welcome change. From here they part company with their newest of friends and delve deep into the virgin forests of Taman Negara and its abundance of Bat poop. Only the prospect of the worlds finest snorkeling and perfect beaches could pull them away from there poop lined palace in the woods and the Perhentians didn't disappoint.

Where do we go now i hear you murmur under stifled breath? Well since that was about 2 weeks ago now, i can answer your burning questions and supply you with our latest fix of travel induced gossip.

The boarder into Thailand was only a short bus journey away. Surprisingly easily and without any questions regarding drugs we entered this ancient Kingdom where H.M. King Rama IX held in highest esteem. As we stared out the window or leant out the doorways of our train heading up to the islands, one of thew first things we noticed was huge pictures and shrines dedicated to the King and his wife. In every building and almost every room there is a picture of him hanging on the walls. On street corners and roundabouts he stares at you daring you to accidentally step on some money. This is a criminal offence as you are standing on a picture of his face if you do and punishable by a long time in a Bangkok jail.

Arriving at 3am in Chumphon, we found a boat that would take us and tens of other passengers to Turtle Island, Koh Tao. The smallest of the famous southern islands, its main business is scuba diving. Stories say that the island is called Turtle island because it looks like one but we can tell you now, my big toe looks more like a turtle. More likely is the fact that is used to be a turtle breeding ground but unfortunately no longer. Once King RamaIV came herey tourism followed and i doubt they were so kind as we are today to the poor old turtles. Anyway less history and more gossip i hear you scream. Well we have a replacement BBF in the form of another english man named Adam. Big guy with a crazy accent he's a barrel of laughs. Especially while on a scooter. For 4 quid each we had the hire of a scooter each for the day and the fact that we are not currently mourning over one of us at the minute is a miracle. On hearing that my 100cc Yamaha Mio could not handle the "roads" to the north of the island i could never back down from a challenge and so in the pitch dark me and bubs headed north. Needless to say we made it, me and bubs owned Koh Tao! Snorkeling was a bit of a let down but chillaxing on the beach and swimming was island life as it should be. Oh by the way, rumours may be circulating of a certain person being involved in a little whoopsie. I can now lay those rumours to rest and confirm that yes, Mr Rory Charles Eves was a casualty of a horrific crash which resulted in major lacerations to his arms and considerable damage to his poor bike. Well at least thats what the lady we rented the bikes from seems to think. Though really all was fine and dandy.,

Wallet lighter and arm patched up we made the monthly migration to Koh Pha-nagn for the internationally acclaimed beach party, The Full Moon Party. Once there though a helpful, and believe me you can't say that about all the taxi drivers over here, informed us that the FMP had changed date and we were far too early. With a tight schedule already we decided to cut our losses and save ourselves from a night of beach party scandal and antics and head straight up to Bangkok.

Jumping back in the boat we came on and then a good long bus journey later, we arrived in the unhealthily early morning, in the hustle and bustle of Thai Capital. Immediately Tuk-Tuk drivers smelt fresh blood, or just fat western wallets and badgered us to get in their 3 wheeled limousines. Refraining from the money sapping tuk-tuks, we trapsed our way through the alleys of Bangkok to find our humble abode, Riverview Guest House. OK we were close to the river, but really, a concrete wall 5m infront of our window does not count as a Riverview. 2 beds and a floor were appreciated though and it was awfully clean for a change.

While Adam slept off a bit of travellers belly etc (try not to picture that) Rory and I ventured into Bangkok to make the most of our few days in this great city. For some reason, we got in to a Tuk-Tuk that took us sight seeing around Bangkok. Well that was a bad idea. Not only did Kwong Lee take us to the worst Wats (Buddhist Temples) the city has to offer, he also is paid to take us places we have no desire on going to. To be fair to him though, the Thai and foot massage that he took us to was superb and just what you need after only 2 hours sleep in the last 2 days or so. The following days was spent exploring more of the city's better temples which were literally breathtaking. So big the camera could barely squeeze it all in to one photo, and so beautiful that no camera would ever do the justice. The Grand Palace and a few museums for extra culture ate up another few hours but maybe a highlight although awfully short, was meeting Rory's old man half way round the world! I'm beginning to realise after days on trains and buses just how big the world is but seeing someone from home again made it all feel so small. In all the world,we just happen to be in the same city at the same time. Another gem of Bangkok, at least this one isn't a fake like the rest in Bangkok, was the Evangelical Church of Bangkok. "Good mornin' ECBBBBBBBB" by cheesy American Pastors was almost as entertaining as the movie "Jumper" that we saw afterwards although the church service was probably a bit more worthwhile. Hearing about some of the work the church was involved with in the city was really moving. Although the penalties for being in possession of drugs here are massive, Bangkok still suffers from major drugs problems.

After 4 days of hustling, lady boys, bartering and Tuk-Tuks, we were more than ready to get out of Bangkok and head up to Chiang Mai where we are currently today. Totally different to the 24hour madness of Bangkok, Chiang Mai is all about elephants and mountains. For now though, thats all you're going to know. Hopefully the next update is not so far away but time is money (about 30p an hour for internet). Oh before i say my farewells, a young gentleman asked about the food here. For someone who is such a fan of stuffing my face i am ashamed that i have bot mentioned it earlier. Generally because we are poor travellers we stick to good old Chicken rice or Chicken noodles. Infact so popular are these dishes amongst poor travellers that chicken Pad Thai (noodles) is synonymous among all travellers and sometimes the only Thai travellers would ever remember. On feeling ignorant and embarrassed about my lack of language skills i am doing my best to pick up handy phrases and always keen to tantalise my pallet with new dishes. Of course though, western food is everywhere although much more expensive. Thai and Malay food is spicy and so much more tasty than our bland rubbish back home. That is why i hope to do a cookery class and wow you all back home with my Asian cuisine and acrobatic use of chop sticks. We'll see about that.

That's all folks. Hope your thirsts for worldly knowledge are quenched, your hunger for mindless ramblings of a traveller satisfied and your burning ears overloaded with gossip from your favourite, former pasty white Irish friends, Rory and Ryan.

xoxo